Dear Missy: How do I choose between my two friends?
Dear Missy,
I’m feeling really confused and upset about my friendship group. Recently, two of my closest friends had a big argument over something silly, but now they’re making me choose sides. I feel like I’m stuck in the middle, and no matter what I do, I’ll upset one of them.
It’s getting so stressful that I don’t even want to hang out with them anymore because the tension is unbearable. I just want things to go back to normal, but I don’t know how to fix this without getting dragged in even more.
What should I do?
– Torn Between Two Friends
Dear Torn Between Two Friends,
First of all, I totally get why you’re feeling stuck. Friendship drama can be so exhausting, especially when you’re caught in the middle! But remember, it’s not your job to fix the situation or pick sides.
What you can do is be clear with both friends that you don’t want to take sides. Maybe say something like, “I care about both of you, but I don’t want to be part of the argument.” Let them know that while you’re there to support each of them individually, you’re not a referee in their disagreement.
If the tension is too much, it’s okay to take a little space from the situation. True friends will respect your boundaries, and hopefully, they’ll come to realize that the drama isn’t worth losing you over.
Friendships do go through ups and downs, and sometimes a little time and perspective is all that’s needed to get back to normal. Hang in there, and stay true to yourself—you’ve got this!
– Missy
If you have a dilemma you can email us at hello@missy.ie