Are you guilty of self-sabotage?
Types of self-sabotage include the thinking and behavioural habits that prevent you from achieving your goals. It is possible to overcome all forms of self-sabotage. The first step is to identify how you sabotage yourself and then you will be ready to tackle the issue straight on.
Here are some types of self-sabotage that you might have fallen prey to in the past…
Perfectionism
Perfectionism is when we constantly look for perfection in our everyday lives and see anything less as a ‘failure’. However, in reality nothing is ever perfect. If you look for long enough you will find multiple flaws in everything. Even in nature, the most beautiful flowers have flaws.
This way of thinking can be quite exhausting. Constantly spotting mistakes leaves perfectionists to be quite critical of themselves. Many tasks take far longer than expected to complete as you are constantly making adjustments and convincing yourself ‘I just need to change this and then it will be perfect’.
This will turn into an endless cycle. Once you spot one mistake and fix it, then you will spot another and on it goes. This will only take time away from other tasks you need to complete and as a result these will suffer. Set your deadline, do your best, finish it and then as the song says “Let it Go”!
Read More: We Need To Stop Our Obsession With ‘Perfection’
Self-criticism
This goes hand in hand with perfectionism but can also be regarded as a standalone form of self-sabotage. We have all had experienced moments in our lives where we have been self-critical. This can lead to feelings of doubt, insecurity and unworthiness. You are not alone in this.
Unfortunately, it is quite a common occurrence in today’s society. When you encounter these emotions, it is best to express them, whether that means talking to someone you trust or writing it down. Self-criticism can take a huge toll on our mental health and is very destructive. It is always a good thing to look for support. We all need it from time to time and there is never any shame in asking for help.
Ignoring your emotions
Your emotions are valid, and they deserve your attention. Ignoring them can be harmful towards both your physical and mental health. You may be doing it because you fear judgement from others for feeling a particular way or because you feel like you might be a burden. A real friend will take the time to listen to and support you.
Processing your feelings is important. They can be quite complex, and it is critical to take the time you need to accept them. Emotions that have been ignored can begin to affect your life. You may be prone to angry outbursts or feelings of anxiety. Suppressing these emotions will make any future challenging situations all the more difficult to navigate.
Procrastination
I’ll come back to that later! We all do this especially when do not particularly like the task we have to complete. It is just so easy to leave the things you need to do until tomorrow.
Often times we can abandon our work until right before the deadline. This causes a mountain of stress that could have been avoided if only you had not left everything to the last minute. You knew in your heart this would happen, but you pushed this thought aside. Yet now you are beating yourself up for not getting started earlier. This is a lesson to learn for the future. At least that’s what you tell yourself. However, this will continue to happen unless you put a firm stop to it.
If you are procrastinating about doing something right now, this is your sign to put your head down and just do it. Get rid of all distractions and get started! You will thank yourself later and will probably find once you begin the task that it is actually not as difficult as you.
Read More: How To Stop Procrastinating
It is possible to overcome these types of self-sabotage. Realising what you’re doing and taking proactive steps to minimise it as much as possible is so important.
It’s also important to go easier on yourself. Often we set ourself up to fail by placing too much pressure on ourselves to do it all, be the best and act like we have it all together. It’s ok to fail. It’s ok to not have it all figured out. We’re all just trying to do our best in life, don’t sabotage yourself before you’ve even started.